Bleeding Hearts

I vaguely noticed that there was pink in the garden when we came home Sunday afternoon. It was when Nessa had gone outside and sat down out in her backyard. I think she would have also have gone to check on her fish, but didn't have the energy for it. If I had known it would be the last time in one of her favorite places, I would have taken over to the pond to also see her fish.

I think its supposed to cloud up tomorrow, so this morning was the best time to go out into the backyard and take pictures of the Bleeding Hearts putting on their show. For me appropriate because I still feel as if my heart is bleeding.

Thank you to all who have written condolences here. Many of you have also lost a beloved pet and know the heartache. Some have even met Nessa and remember her. Norbert is grieving too. We were able to get him to play ball a bit last night, he goes with me every night to pick up Brandon from work. Norbert is sleeping a lot, me not so much. Neither one of us is really eating like we should. We'll work on that. Next week after Spring Break is over and kids are back in school, I'm going to make sure that we both get out every day for walks in parks, Nessa's favorites of course.

Tuesday I went through all my photos of her and picked out a lot to be printed into photos at Walgreens, they after all had sent me a coupon. I'll pick one for a special frame to go on my desk so that I'll be able to see her little smiling face everyday. The place we took her to be cremated offered to clip some of her hair for me and to also do a casting of her paw prints. I'd trimmed her nails, but one paw, of course one of the front paws. Hopefully they trim it before doing the casting.

I'm going to take the time to write her life story down. I think it might help my grieving process and I'll have it later. I know she won't be forgotten by her family, but memories do dim with time.

I have also put out the call for a good breeder of Miniature Schnauzers, preferably one that is local so that friend Greta can come with me and be my voice of reason. I love those Schnauzer faces and while it won't be Nessa's, I think it will help. I've promised that I won't bring home a puppy for two weeks. It wouldn't be fair to either of us to bring a puppy immediately in the house.